I thought I searched for enlightenment
Only to be disappointed over and over again
As it eluded me, as nothing was good enough
To break the mold–the algebraic pattern inside me.
I found myself always faltering with echoes of
You’re not enough arising over and over again
From the past to the present from the known
To a thousand faces of strangers when something
True jumped out at me and like a Temple bell chiming–
Through a small synchronistic moment of chance.
“You’re on the wrong journey,” Silence said and queried me.
“What were the first words you spoke?” Silence hungered,
hungered to hear my answer. “Go Happy, Go Lucky.”
It took weeks till garbled words became dancers. It is amazing.
Of all those scenes leaping across the screen, I picked
Those words. How did I not become a Lucky Striker.
Often still I felt misunderstood, unlucky, unenlightened.
I wondered. Again, “You’re on the wrong journey.
It was enlightening. “How do I do the happiness journey?”
Reflection: As I sat at my desk eating an early dinner, after no breakfast or lunch besides a large cup of chai, and trying to get myself realigned from the strange start to my day, and the absolutely grey and cloudless sky with an intolerable amount of humidity, I found myself looking for something, Ending up becoming engrossed in sorting out papers to find it, I decided to trust life that everything would get done, including the reading I wanted to finish doing for school. So I continued and ended up entertaining myself with a movie I had never heard of–HECTOR AND THE SEARCH FOR HAPPINESS, while I continued my search. This is a beautiful beautiful movie well worth watching. I highly suggest it, because it speaks to things on many levels. I found it on Netflix. Enjoy. It is wonderful. I’m going to watch it again. Who knows maybe I’ll find the paper I’m looking for. (from 2015)